It's Ok To Cry !

Folks , we all have had some bad times. This Blog is about myself and my trails and tribulations. Just wanting you all too know , that I, myself, are not perfect, I do have flaws, And since, this blog is centered around Everyone has flaws no one's perfect . I have my own story to tell. It's not really a flaw but, I'll let you be the judge of that. Here is my story . This month of June has been bitter-sweet for me. My mom was murdered on June 23,1986. She was a beautiful woman who loved everyone and always saw the good in a person. My mom, had me, when she was a tender age of 15 years old. I was the first grandchild ever to be born in my grandmother's house in West Bay Grand Cayman. My mom left me with my grandparents to go to New York and be with her aunt. My mom , found some work in Long Island and this is where she met my Step dad. Mr. Owens, gentleman,as he is today raised me and he was the only father that I had known , besides my grandfather. I was only three, when momma came back to get me. My dad told me the story about how he met momma, and how beautiful she was. He would say "when your mother opened the door I got struck by cupid's arrow in the rear" "In the rear daddy?" Yes , this was true , he fell so deeply madly in love. They dated for a while but, he wanted to take this relationship to another level. Dad did ask mom, to marry him. She replied "No , I can't marry you, I have a daughter back home " He said , that that was no problem and that is when she came to get me. So all these years we lived good , momma had her bread buttered on both sides. Then, I had a baby brother, I was 6 going on 7 and had missing teeth . What a sight when I look back at my pictures. My brother, and I grew up together. Then , the worst, happened, Momma was not happy with her life and she decided to end her marriage and dad was devastated , so were we. They got divorced and times were rough, but dad was always around and he never forsake us. He is the ideal dad still today. In between all of that, momma, had another relationship and out came another baby boy. He was beautiful , and still is today. Well moving right along, I moved to South Carolina, and went to High school and graduated . My 2 grandmother's were there on June 5th 1981 to see me walk across the stage ,boy was my momma proud of me. after graduation, I went back to New York. I showed all of my friends my diploma most of my friends were still in school getting ready to graduate and such. But I was the big kid, I got my diploma and ever thing else first, I bragged. I have a best friend that can't compare to none. She has always been around for me and vise-versa. Moving right along, I lived with my brother and my dad for a little while. My youngest brother, was living with his dad. Mom left him when he was three. She said ,"that was the hardest thing that she had ever done" I cried , and crying while I'm writing this . I tried everything to make things right for my little brother, I even moved to Brooklyn and stayed in the same apartment that I grew up in. I then moved back home,and starting dating a gentle man who lived in my apartment building. Back home is far rock away Queens. We got married against my dads wishes, but I felt trapped, always helping out never doing anything for my self. Boy If I could take back somethings I would . Now daddy raised us to be believers in Jesus and I still do! We went to church all the time. Daddy was very good to us! AS I move along, being married had it's ups and downs,My husband was very good to me. He is from Trinidad and Tobago we are no longer together. Then came the bad news one day. I was working at woolworth, and when I came back from lunch , my co-worker said "There was a young man looking for you" Well the young man was my brother, He said to me while at work that he just received news that momma had been shot,. I replied , Oh is she ok where is she is she in the hospital? My brother placed his hand over my mouth and said, she's in the hospital but in the morgue. I fainted I know that much, when I came to, I could not breathe all I could do was cry . Coming home from that was not good, I called my husband and he came home right away. I had to call my other step father and he said he just got the news. I cried even more, thinking about my baby brother who was at least 7 going on 8 . I rushed to him and he was sad, he hardly knew momma. Again we still deal with this problem. I went back to Cayman, to bury my mom, she was shot three times and the person who did this to her killed someone else that same night. The deaths were not related they say. Momma was going to leave this man,but it was too late. After,leaving New York and my marriage was not going any better, I decided that I would go back and take care of my mother's belongings. A few months passed by , my sister in law told me that my husband is expecting. I said "expecting what" She replied "a baby" I said ok ,then I contacted him and come to find out that he already had become a dad. I wished him well and said to him "This baby will need you more then I would " and we should get a divorce. He didn't like the idea but what are you gonna do? We are not together, and I'm thousand of miles away. After all this I had a relationship with one of my friends that I would play with while visiting my grandparents in the Cayman's. So when I came back to Cayman , I looked great and so did he. So you know what happened! We dated for awhile and I went back to New York and filed for my divorce, then I headed back to the Cayman Islands missing my boyfriend . We were in love . I started feeling ill, got the news that I am pregnant, I was 25 at the time. I was excited, about being a mom and having my first baby. I was a few months pregnant when my divorce came through and was happy about that. Then June rolled in, I was about to have my baby. My due date was June 22,nd 1989, but she came on the 21st of June. Then it finally hit me ,after having all this joy it was also sad for me because my momma was not there and this was the 3rd anniversary of her death. So I was happy then sad. Abuse rolled in and then I had to leave my daughters father, and got hooked up with another guy who I had a son by. That was no better. So I had my 2 children before I reached 30. My daughter who is 20 now just celebrated her birthday and my mom who has been gone for 23 years now and it still hurts. I did remarry . He was my high school friend we got married on March 25,th 2006 and he treats me so special, WE all have our ups and downs , who doesn't . My son the "Ladies Man" is 17 and will be 18 this December. He will graduate in 2010 thank god. now after having said all of this. I quess your are wondering why It's ok to cry. It's been rough, this month and having to miss my momma, and losing a wonderful person that we all know and love ,Yes Michael Jackson, made me feel that I just lost another family member. I do miss the times when momma would play his albums and we would dance. Well folks, this is my story, and I know IT'S OKAY TO CRY ! Be Well.

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How to Avoid A Heart Attack .. Men

Men it's time that you get a good check up and take care of yourself. Checking your cholesterol and blood pressure are good ways to prevent a heart attack. Eat right and always see your health care provider and get plenty of rest. 1. the heart is a big muscle First, what is a heart attack? A heart attack is medically known as a myocardial infraction. this occurs when a blood clot blocks one of the coronary arteries. Each coronary artery supplies blood to a specific part of the heart's muscular wall. A blocked artery can cause pain and malfunction in the area it supplies. 2. Step 2 chest pain one of the symptoms of a heart attack ! Most people are pretty familiar with a description of the heart attack, the crushing chest pressure, pain, heading towards the neck, jaw, back and of course your arm. You may also have sweating, shortness of breath and a sudden case of indigestion that is not relieved by an antacid. If you experience any of these symptoms you need to call 911 right away. Make sure that you have some family members around if not keep your phone by your side. 3. Step 3 being over weight is another risk factor ! Heart disease is the number one killer of men in the united states alone. Plaque is made up of cholesterol and the bad high levels of bad LDL cholesterol in the bloodstream are the leading risk factors for heart attack in men. There are other risk factors such as obesity and overweight Diabetes Age Smoking High Blood Pressure and other sedentary lifestyle Stress is another leading risk factor as well. Sudden and over whelming stress can trigger a heart attack in most cases. studies have shown that stress can cause men to have unhealthy eating habits along with smoking , therefore causing men not to exercise and develop bad habits 4. Step 4 Exercise is best Try it under your doctor's supervision Some men with depression can shut their selves in and not do any actives, such as sex, a walk in the park, maybe dancing, or playing a round of putt putt . Men get scared because he is worried if he does any type of exercise he may in-counter another heart attack. Therefore he may not want to do anything at all this can cause a problem in the bedroom area folks! Have consultation with your doctor and he will give you the heads up on what to so. Actually exercise is beneficial to the heart . Go get that check up and take your partner out on the town and live again Be Well.

How to Have a Sex Life With Psoriatic Arthritis

Sure , you'll have to make adjustments, but knowing these tips you will reclaim your sex life. 1. Step 1 painful joint pain Folks don't think that you can't have a normal sex life because you suffer from psoriatic arthritis. The joint pain , the swelling and the stiffness that is associated with arthritis can make some sexual positions uncomfortable, and the grayish- white scaling of over the dullish red skin rash that is caused by the psoriasis can make you feel self-conscious. This does not have to get in your way from having healthy sex. 2. Step 2 get some exercise If anything having sex could make the pain from joint inflammation and the stiffness feel better. Most people find that are stiff in the morning and active latter on in the day. By having an activity such as sex in the morning does help one to loosen up . So sex is great in the morning ! Sex is exercise and tends to make the back pain associated with psoratic arthritis improve 3. Step 3 Sex should be pleasurable , so plan accordingly. If your stiff in the morning or your so tired in the evening plan a romp in the afternoon. Call your sweetie and say let's have some afternoon delight. believe me he or she will come running. Here's some tip that may help. Make sure you are rested apply a heating pad for sore joints take your pain medication before hand massage your muscles and joints (you can use this a form of foreplay) use pillow to support you and your partner. 4. Step 4 talk about the different positions that you can do Don't do any positions that will cause you any extra pain. You can experiment with ones that are right for you and your partner. If your having hip problems try making love your partner on her side, and you enter from behind. Here is another position that you can try . The woman is on her knees ( now make sure that she doesn't have knee problems) on a pillow leaning against the bed . Another position the man lies on the bed with his partner sitting on top ,if her legs hurt she should not spread them apart. There are days that your partner may not want to have sex because of the flare ups and pain. So discuss this with your partner they will understand. See a rheumatologist they can help with this problem Be Well !

Sinusitis: Simple Remedies For The Clogged Head

Many people that I know who have a sinus problem are also frustrated with all the misery that it brings. There's the headache,stuffy nose,post nasal drip, can't breath ,nor smell or taste. That's not a good feeling. Sinusitis occurs when the mucus membranes that line your sinuses become inflamed and creating nasal congestion and bacterial infection . The inflammation is usually triggered by allergies, bacteria, viruses , stress, and sometimes genetic disorders. Many smokers often have bad sinusitis because of all the harsh burning chemical that constantly irritates their sinuses. people who have frequent upper-respiratory infections or who have major post nasal drip are prone to sinusitis. When this is bad you may also have a fever and some swelling , discomfort and swelling of the neck and you may even have an earache with compliments of a stuffy nose. If your not sure what is causing your sinusitis check with your health provider. If your having this problem more than three times a year and the time between episodes are short or if it doesn't clear up with in 7 days , you may have an intense infection. Here are some home remedies that may help , it helped a few of my friends, But always check with your doctor. Take a bite of horseradish root. Eat 1/4 teaspoon of prepared horseradish three times daily. You can make your own by grating 1 teaspoon of fresh root into 1 cup of hot water. Let steep for about 5 minutes; then strain. drink 3 cups a day. To really open up your nasal passages try using a sinus oil 1 to 2 times a daily . Get a clean wash cloth and soak in hot water(be careful not to burn yourself), apply this to your face to increase the circulation to the area . keep the cloth there for 5 minutes, and keep resoaking it in hot water as hot as you can tolerate it. Apply a thin layer of olive oil to the frontal bone this is above your eyes and your cute little cheek bones starting below your eyes and onto the boney part of your nose palce some eucalyptus oil onto your fingers and rub into those areas place the hot rag again for at least 20 minutes and get plenty of rest. You can use saline nasal spray several times a day . This can remove mucus that harbor bacteria. Find a spray that have eucalyptus . Eucalyptus can kill bacteria, betcha didn't know that did you. Inhaling steam is another good way of unclogging your sinuses. Make a tent with a towel over a hot bowl of steam be careful . Breathe in the steam and add some vicks vapo steam a few drops, or better yet use eucalpytus leaves and bresathe in the fresh aroma. Don't drink milk it tends to create mucus you already have enough of that all in your head When swimming try using nose plugs chlorine can be just as irrating as the people in the pool splashing water all in your face. Oh drink plenty of water this will help thin ourt your nasal mucus. Last but not least, try frying some salt in apan then spread it onto a cloth and put over bridge of your nose and relax the heat will open up your sinuses. Be Well !

How Music Therapy Can Help With Stroke Recovery

Did you know that music therapy helps stroke patients relearn old skills , like walking again and learning how to speak again. This can help you reconnect with life. You can regain self independence . You can regain movement and be in a cheerful mood all at the same time. Many people wonder what is music therapy and what is involved. Music therapy is the therapeutic use of music to help patients physically and psychologically recover from a number of medical conditions, this would include a stroke. Most, a patient will receive music therapy because their doctor has recommended that along with physical therapy and occupational therapy . These are all therapies and all can be combined to make the best of the patients recovery. Music therapy can help stroke patients recover by using music and singing techniques can be used to help improve speech. This can help the patient remember songs and their lyrics. It can give them the sense of belonging and can communicate much better. Easing the frustration of not communicating makes it easier for the patient. Patient will feel Good about themselves and have the power of regaining Independence . Music therapy can cost. Your health insurance coverage may reimburse your for music therapy. Medicare has recognized this as a reimbursable service since 1995. In order to be reimbursable, the therapy must be: * prescribed by your doctor * An important part of your therapy * Documented in a treatment plan You can get started with music therapy , if your interested in music therapy as apart of your recovery form a stroke should contact the American Music Therapy Association (www.musictherapy.org) .You can find a therapist in your area. Music therapy with it's many benefits is more enjoyable and relaxing. Take timeout and help someone you know that can benefit from music therapy and watch them regain their strength and confidence. Be well !

Journey To A Smoke-Free You !

Smoking is cool right ? Your so wrong there is nothing glamorous about smoking. First of all it's smells and tastes bad. It doesn't do your breathe or lungs any good. Have you ever kissed anyone with smokers breathe? It's like eating ashes out of an ashtray. That really stinks and it leaves a bad taste in your mouth. Most people have to have a cigarette right after a meal , while others smoke while they drink an so call socialize . It is hard to quit smoking without weight gain. The average person puts on about 10 pounds the most. There are two factors why this is so. 1. Most people eat more , if your not smoking you tend to put something else in your mouth. Since your smell and taste buds are back to normal , things that are sugary and sweet become very attractive to the eye. 2.The second reason is your metabolic Nasty Nicotine does increase the metabolic rate. When you stop smoking , your metabolic rate decreases. One of the best ways to avoid weight gain , Start up the exercise. When you stop smoking you can breathe better,walk better, have sex longer. Not only when you stop smoking, this will help keep off the nervous energy that you have. Many smokers now tend to do more exercise and eat right foods and have healthy well visits to their doctor. Ask your doctor about advice on how to stop smoking and get help fast. Get your friends to help support you and maybe they can stop too. Make this part of your plan to want to quit, Having a plan will help and keep you focused on your journey to not smoking. Keep some sugar-free candies around and gum you can try the nicotine gum if you wish. Keep tic tacs in your pocket purse and in your car. You may want to munch and crunch on a carrot, this keeps the mouth busy. Do a journal and keep track of your success and tell others of the progress that you have made. Good luck !

Getting rid of the pesky back.!

Folks are you taking your back for granted? We sometimes forget that when we add extra weight that our bodies are just so happy about that. Take consideration about what your body is telling you. Do something about it nobody likes a bad back . You can't even function . Everybody else out there having fun and your home sick with bad back. We like to lounge in our lounge chairs. Nothing beats this after a long day at work and you get home ah there's the chair. this chair leans all the way back and lifts your feet into the air and your in 7th heaven. but what happens if you don't have that lounger that Ted has . You can lie on the floor with your legs on the couch or a chair and put a pillow under your head and you can also purchase some foam -rubber that has a wedge in it and place under your feet when in bed. This helps the circulation and takes the weight off your back. most people with out of whack backs do tend to heal with time. Many relied on pain-killers and changing positions ,wearing a back brace, or maybe getting that new desk chair at the office. Whatever it takes you want to make sure that you find something that will help that back. You want to protect that back and make it feel better when it hurts the most. Find a recognized (OMT) this is a doctor that specialize in Osteopathic manipulated therapy . Unlike most traditional doctors , the osteopath will take a look at a detailed structural exam of your musculoskeletal system can do a evaluation of the spaces between each vertebra. Other doctors, on the other hand do test on motion such as bending, or turning . But they never look at the vertebra. This here is critical. Finding a local osteopath who can stretch and move your soft tissues to relieve the pain that your having and maybe you can go back normal motions I read that the National Institutes of health has agreed that acupuncture for a number of problems . One of them back pain ! Many doctors are referring their patients to licensed Acupuncturist. They use sterile needles and dis Some therapist do treatments in a darkened room with soft music . Acupuncture believe or not is painless and is relaxing most say.Here are some home made remedy's that are natural and will help you heal. To relieve back pain , use one or more for the following herbs in equal parts . Make sure that you follow this mixture. take ginger root ,chamomile,and peppermint,and for muscle spasm add skullcap or Valerian to the herbal mixture. Use 1 teaspoon of the mixture per 1 cup of boiling water. Steep ,covered, for 10 minutes. Drink 1 cup three to fours times a day. Caution folks people with allergies may be sensitive to chamomile. Valerian should not be taken with antidepressants. You can apply Arnica gel is an excellent first aid ointment for joint or muscle pain . If you have inflamed or irritated nerves add several drops

Get Rid of Those Migraine Headaches Fast

Having a migraine can be a big pain in the you know what. It is thee worst headache that you could possibly have. There is so many remedies that you can use, or do. First try to find out why you are having these headaches. It could be stress, hypertension,(high blood pressure) smoking harsh cigars. anything can trigger them. Let's find out how you can target your headaches. This can be helpful to your doctor and he then can prescribe some type of medication for you that will help. I was told that migraines affect women. While men do have them, women have more attacks and more painful ones. A migraine is a complex brain disorder. It can be triggered by anything from diet,hormones,could be that change in the weather. Maybe even your sleep pattern . Migraines can be a royal pain when you can't figure out how you get them. Some say acupuncture works the best. Your doctor can refer you to your local acupuncturist. They specialize in that field . Make sure that they can provide you with their training. make sure that the acupuncturist use disposable needles. Most acupunturtist will tell you about herbal remedy's as well. You may want to ask . Try drinking coffee , when taking medications, it helps your body absorb medications quickly. Talk to your doctor about what new medications are there for you to try, also let your doctor know what medications that your currently taking . Be Well !

Old Home Remedys to ward off Heat Rash

AS you know, that heat rash or any kind of rash is no fun. Summertime is drawing near and the hot summer heat is enough to drive you silly. This is where you want to stay cool and hydrated. Drinking plenty of water and staying cool is the best way to keep you body from all sorts of infections that's associated with rashes and such. Finding shade will help your rash if you tend to be outdoors for a long time. Prickly heat is a common known rash that pops up when the weather is extremely hot. When your body gets over heated, with a fever or over working yourself, a rash will develop when your sweat ducts get blocked. This will cause tiny red dots that will itch. Stay in a cool place and rashes usually disappear. Keep the area clean and dry . When soaked with sweat, try showering and cool off if you can Wear some loose clothing , the more gets to your skin the better you feel If you like to eat oatmeal, you may want to use it on your skin. Get regular oatmeal and place some in your bath water. Soak yourself for a half hour. You will start to feel the relief. Having a shower after a work out or whatever activity that you are doing , is a great way to relax and keep cool. Showers are so refreshing and can cool your body down quickly. Always use a mild soap that is not too perfumery. Try knowing your triggers. Find out if it is something that you might eat or drink that can cause your rash. You maybe allergic to metal, or wheat, or who know' s. Try using an Apple Cider Sponge Bath. This is an old home remedy and you with care. Use 1 teaspoon of apple cider vinegar to 1 cup of water sponge this mixture onto your itchy skin , any rashy area this will cause the balancing ph of your skin to soothe and go away. Make sure that you keep a food diary just in case you have eaten something that may break you out always check with your doctor Be well.